~Some random outbursts~
I kind of miss the devastating dramas I used to create to bring in chaos in my existence so far because for now, right at this moment, I dwell in peace.
So, I figured out in the process that I will always want the things I don't have, badly and will continue to do so till I lost the precious present moments at hand and then, cry my heart out for what l have done. I have never quite stopped blaming myself for all the wrong things I have done, despite knowing that it's against my best interests. But you see, I just can't help it. I can't help myself in every fucked up situations. I need a hand to hold, I need a soul to console me at my darkest hours. No matter how horribly I threw up tantrums, how shamelessly I scolded to grow cold. I know my heart will always yearn for you, bittersweet misery. My mind will whirl with memories of you. Until, I come to a point of no return to rely on the opinions of the optionated mind. For you know, I never quite liked the idea of half assed in-betweens, it has always been all or nothing for me. You either hate or love me for me. You just can't keep hustling between two strong emotions for long. It will tire you AF. And it sucks AF. So, I dare you to choose, with no regrets. You will thank your stars for not goofing off and ultimately, pulling it off for I will try not to be poisoned by your bitterness towards me.
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