Offering myself the constant
reminder, that I will walk again,
move again, flow through
my practice again.
A dramatic and non-negotiable
slowing down has been required.
I’ve not been able to walk
without a home-made crutch since Friday night, after going to a chiropractor to help with an existing injury; he made it far worse and more painful than I’ve known before.
There’s been nothing for me to do
While my mind wants to spin out over the work I’m missing, the boxes that need unpacking, and a myriad other things, I’ve been forced to just
Things have surfaced. Clarity, perspective, a lot of tears that needed to come out have flowed.
I’ve learned that in general, I move too fast. I don’t let myself cry enough. Since my diagnosis 3 years ago I’ve never had time off, for there are always bills and rent to pay. In the past 6 months I’ve been through more stressful change than I have in almost 3 years.
A much deeper change is being called for here.
Im learning, the work of healing requires both effort and surrender. A constant redirecting of thoughts, from focus on pain to focus on wellness.
Allowing deeply, a sense of empathy, for all I’ve endured that need not be labelled pity, but rather, self-love. >>>
A willingness to go in to the pain and feel, listen, breathe. A willingness to adjust my self practice from movement-focused to breath focused.
Breath is Prana. I feel Gratitude for so many things I took for granted. True health is a daily practice of integrating all our layers.
Setting goals, never my thing but today, my goal is to leave the house and make a trip to the market. Wish me luck! 💜