So often we get so caught up in chasing after love.
Like we think when we get it, find it, our lives will somehow magically shift.
Now don’t get me wrong I’m a lover of love and fully recognize how much an aligned relationship can add to and amplify your experience of being alive.
But let’s be clear, the source of your fulfillment is always an inside game.
When we chase after love from a place of feeling empty inside we make all sorts of self-compromising choices that don’t actually enhance our lives. Sure they bring lessons like a two by four to the head, but the relationships that enhance our lives are the ones that begin from a legit full cup.
I just had a beautiful convo with my cab driver as he brought me to the airport. He shared he was fresh out of a breakup and didn’t feel ready to enter a relationship. He said he felt guarded. And I reminded him that what he was feeling was ok, normal and he didn’t need to feel open to loving yet.
We discussed what it takes to work through heartbreak instead of “getting over it and prematurely moving on” which for the record doesn’t work, it just pushes our feelings further down.
I reminded him he had full permission to feel his feelings, that it was normal to be sad and to grieve what was and the future they had planned. And that there would be an inevitable time his heart would heal and it would feel normal, natural and easy to lean into love again.
Pushing ourselves to be somewhere we aren’t isn’t honoring.
It’s ok to take time after one relationship ends to heal and no one gets to tell you when the right time is for you to open to love again.
So in those times you’re not quite ready to lean into love with another, lean into loving you, cherish who you are, take care of your heart, feel the feelings and rediscover who you’ve become as a result of the relationship you were in. It’s a very valuable time one that gives you an opportunity to cultivate radiance from the inside out.
One that allows you to build a life that feels good for you to be in.
One that allows you to find a home in your own heart.
And from this place of fullness, I promise you love will find you.