Have you ever been at that point in your life where you just couldn’t do it anymore?
I can’t tell you how many times I found myself hiding in the closet crying my eyes out, or in the shower so I could cry as loud as I wanted.
Today, I am so proud of myself for finding the reason to keep going, to get up and keep moving forward. And you should be too.
Life is freakin hard!!! Too hard at times, but please find a reason to rise♥️ Follow us @recycledheart_
for more inspiration✨ We love you ♥️
Updatetime; Yesterday I was so happy. Just because the sun was shining, I had a great day and vocalclass. Since I started realrecovery, I am able to be truly happy again. And not just because I lost weight or was able to skip dinner. No, I am happy because I have the energy again to do and enjoy things. To live. There are still days were all I want to do is cry and skip meals, but those days rarely occur and are easier to overcome. Food won't kill you, food will give you back life. Eventhough it's so freaking hard, it's worth it. Every single step, tear and therapysession. I am here for you if you want to talk or rant, but keep fighting. Please.
Throwing it back 11 years 😱 Senior year when I was at my lowest, but also most unhappy.
Done is better than giving up again, even stopped for a little dance break while my internet was buffering #countryliving
(yea that’s a thing out here). So many good things happened today! -I am going to rank advance in my business
-Biggest paycheck yet!
-Court went well!
-my eating wasn’t horrible despite my stress
-and my dog thinks I am nuts but I am ok with that!!
Contrary action is one of the program tools that has changed my life the most. When I do esteemable things I get self-esteem. Crazy how it works!
-breakfast: oats with apple 🍎, flax, vanilla powdered pb, strawberries 🍓 and almond milk 🥛 -snacks: a strawberry muffin, black corn chips and a pear 🍐 -lunch: toast with avocado 🥑, vegan chickpea scramble, watermelon 🍉 and apple 🍎 -snack: strawberry muffin -dinner: sweet potato 🍠 with beans and peanut and veggie curry thing
Today was okay, pretty fun. I talked to lots of friends and also, my crush. It wasn’t like a deep conversation at all. But we actually discussed going on a date as a joke. I don’t know though, it might happen. Life is so much more fun when you enjoy your meals and your time with friends without worrying about food and exercise. Speaking of which, I actually exercised today and I’m loving it !! I love challenging myself, both with the exercises and the post and pre workout fuel !! #edwarrior #anorexiawarrior #anawontwin #anorexiafighter #edrecovery #edrecoverywarrior #roadtorecovery #beatana #edfam #prorecovery #anawho #fuckana #recoveryisworthit #strongnotskinny #bootynotbones #fightingana #edfighter #eatingdisorderrecovery #recoveringfromanorexia #anorexia #screwana #anasucks #chooserecovery #anawarrior #edrecoveryfam #plantbased #plantbasedrecovery #vegan #veganrecovery
.:. Hope you all had a good day. My day was horrible. Absolutely horrible. I mean, I know I toured a college today, but that didn’t make my day any better. I think I’m forever traumatized now because of something that happened. Or almost happened. I hate April 4th so much. I am not happy for that day to come. Anyway, I completely broke down and started crying in dance class tonight. Plus I was lying on the dance floor in pain and I wasn’t able to get up, so that was awesome. I got less than five hours of sleep last night. And I have a feeling that this is gonna be a 20 hour day for me. I won’t be able to sleep until midnight. I just know it. I hate my life so much honestly, and I want to die. I want it all to be over... Goodnight. .:. •
End of .•.•.•. Vessel Era .•.•.•.
hey lovelies! 💞I thought I would do 20 non-ed related facts about me. Here is a good (not) picture of me taken couple of months ago :)
1. My name is delia, and I’m 16 years old
2. I’m in 11th grade, will be in 12th grade this upcoming summer (wish me luck 😬)
3. My favorite subjects are history & chemistry
4. I want to major in either criminal justice or criminology
5. I’m very introverted, so I don’t have as much friends
6. I’m absolutely intrigued by nutrition, so I’m thinking of having it as a side major during college
7. I’m a straight A student
8. I’m a perfectionist
9. I love love love animals
10. Once I’m fully recovered, I want to become vegan
11. My favorite place in the world is Disneyland !! thank god i live close by it
12. I loveeee baking & cooking !! It’s like the most relaxing hobby for me
13. I’m a perfectionist
14. I’m really horrible at initiating conversations
15. My favorite music artist/group: Justin Timberlake & Foster the people
16. I love exercising, it’s my number one de-stressor
17. My favorite season is fall
18. Christmas is my favorite holiday 🎄
19. My biggest pet peeve is people who are arrogant
20. My favorite tv shows are: criminal minds, grey’s anatomy, and the vampire diaries •
#recovery #recoveryisworthit #anorexiarecovery #anorexianervosa #anorexia #bingeeating #bingeeatingdisorder #fitness #edwarrior #like4like #healthy
Okay! I’m aware this isn’t the most flattering food pic 🙈 but I can’t believe I managed to finish this humongous slice of pizza! I’m pretty proud if I do say so myself 🙈
Earlier today while my friend was in her class, I decided to go to a cafe to get some lunch because I knew it was around that time. But the closest cafe on campus was one I hadn’t been to before, and so I didn’t know how to order the food or where to go to pay since there were no visible cashiers around. And since it was near lunch time there were a lot of people in the cafe, so my social anxiety shot up and I felt a panic attack coming so unfortunately I had to leave the cafe with no food and work on calming myself down.
I ended up eating this slice of pizza at 5 pm after my friend’s class got out, which I’m aware meant I went a lot of hours and a majority of the day without food. Which I am not proud of. But I did make it up with this big slice! And with dessert after to make sure I hit all my exchanges for the day!
I actually had a good day out with my friend, and so I tried not to let my disappointment in myself ruin my mood for the rest of our trip.
This event just reinforced that I still have along way to go recovery-wise, but it also demonstrates to me how far I actually have come. Before I would have thought “well I messed up already, the whole day’s ruined now” and I would have easily fallen back into behaviors and such intense negative self-talk. But today I didn’t do that. I chose to come at myself with compassion, and to stay recovery focused and make up the exchanges I had missed.
So there was good and not so good today. But every day won’t always be good. It’s important to realize this, and to also realize we can turn not so good days into better days. If we slip up once, it does not mean the whole day is ruined. We have endless chances during the day to make recovery focused choices. And that’s what’s important. That’s what matters. If you slip up, come at yourself with compassion and care, and try again. Always try again. 💕
Much needed: A self care for men. I looked for one online and couldn’t find one. Thank you to all the men that helped make this list. Which one is your favorite? Tag a man who needs this. 👔
I no longer let alcohol destroy me.
I swear there are rice, beans, and meat underneath all these veggies and salsa. 😂
A steak burrito bowl with white rice, pinto beans, TRIPLE veggies, and medium salsa was a win win from Chipotle!💪🏻
I had a weigh in today and I gained a lb after losing some two weeks ago...Idk how I feel about it, but I managed to still eat rather normally today..😌
Tomorrow’s my last day of school before spring break and I am so excited and ready for a break!! 🙌🏼
Have a lovely night warriors! ❤️❤️
#recovery #recoveryisworthit #recoveryispossible #edrecovery #edwarriors #eatingdisorderrecovery #anorexiarecovery #prorecovery
Yesterday I learned that some of my followers don't know I used to have an eating disorder/didn't follow me for ED recovery posts.😮 Which is rad as hell because it shows I am more than my past!✊ I started this account to help me with my ed recovery and it did, in a way I didn't expect. At first I used IG for accountability by posting all my food, but then it exposed me to possibilities for life after ED. Seeing all the people I was recovering with going to college, getting married, and living a healthy life has been so great.💓Recently a woman I used to know from a pro ana site I frequented as a teen messaged me to say she found me on YouTube by accident.(small world, eh?) I am inspired by the other ED warriors and I sure hope I can inspire others to keep fighting too.💪 I've been moving away from posting food as often because my life no longer revolves around food,(I'm doing so well lately!) but I wanted to post this as a testament to my ability to make a meal out of random things in the cupboard.😂 Carb up and carpe diem!✌💞😊
A protein shake for night snack! This is difficult for me to have tonight because I have been really struggling today! I still ate all my meals and every single thing that I posted! But, I am not going to lie, I definitely was tempted to use behaviors, although I didn’t💪🏼 I drowned Ana’s voice out, even though I feel like complete crap. I just have to remember, the illness is getting desperate. The illness is getting desperate.
Some eats from today! Oatmeal with peanut butter (!!!! A big deal for me) and blueberries, and butternut squash noodles, edamame, and avocado. Being home this week has definitely been good for me, my dietician has really been holding me accountable to my meal plan. The only problem is is that the thoughts have been really loud and I’m nervous that when I go back to school I’m going to try and reverse the progress I’ve made at home... #edsoldier #anawho #eatittobeatit #recoveryisworthit #fearfoodchallenge #eatingdisorderrecovery #anorexiarecovery
Dinner was a turkey burger, buckwheat groats, and cauliflower soup with veggies and bow tie noodles💪🏼
I was busy so I could not post until now. So, I apologize for that!
self harm comes in many forms. for me it included all of the above. but also not eating or eating only foods that i hated, taking freezing cold or scalding hot showers, sleeping without a blanket and the window wide open in december, staring at myself in the mirror for hours knowing that i'd hate what i saw and pick apart my flaws, exercising with injuries because i believed that i deserved the pain anyway, reading text messages that made me feel horrible over and over again to continue making me feel even worse, taking a few too many sleeping pills and playing with chance, not putting on sunscreen so i would get burned, and many others some of which i did knowingly to hurt myself but some of which were also unconscious ways for me to punish myself as my mind believed i deserved... of course there are the stereotypical forms of self harm; the kinds that leave scars. we try to hide them, often with success. but if you look for them you will find them. with these less recognized forms of self harm you won't see it. it's so much easier to hide because we can blend it into the pattern of our day to day lives. but it's still self harm and it does harm us. you can see it, but only if you know what you are looking for which most people don't. so it's important to spread this message: self harm comes in many forms and not always in the ones that the media and the movies try to show us...
#recovery #recoveryispossible #anorexia #recoveryisworthit #recoveryquotes #anxiety #depressed #depressing #depressedquotes #depression #depressionrecovery
#eatingdisorderrecovery #suiciderecovery #selfharrm #selfharmmm #mentalillness #mentalillnessrecovery #mentalillnessawareness #keepfighting #staystrong #alwayskeepfighting #nevergiveup #ihatemyself #selfhate #bulimia #selflove #selfloveisthebestlove #itgetsbetter #fightyourdemons #fixyourwings
I wish I could just wake up recovered 😥
🌐 follow 👉👉👉 @abbiegrrl
"Why be normal?" Normal folks feel bad. Just ask'em! They'll be glad to tell you. CBD is for YOU if you're tired of being normal.