I wish I could tell you when things are going to heal within your heart. I wish I could tell you that you’re better off, and that you deserve so much more than the person who broke you open, than the person who walked away. But I can’t. I can’t. Because I know how difficult it is to lose someone who is responsible for some of the happiest moments in your life. I know how difficult it is to lose someone who filled you with memories, who made you believe, even if just for a moment, in the tenderness and the existence of a love that was created for you. I know how difficult it is to unlearn all of that hope, to unravel it from your bones, to hold those goodbyes between your teeth, to not want to face the reality of that farewell.
All I can tell you is this — all of the things that broke you, all of the things that cracked you open, they are all going to amount to something. They did not happen to you for nothing. And I know how hard it is to see that. I know how hard it is to believe in your growth before you feel it, before you see it. I know how difficult it is to believe in the lessons life is teaching you when they hurt you in ways you never thought you would be hurt, when they are unplanned and unwanted and unruly.
But please, just remember — the people who left, the people who could not value you, the situations and the relationships that did not work out, the endings that came your way, they all led you here. And here you are growing. Here, your losses are lessons. Here you are learning about yourself, and your resilience, and your strength. Here you are healing, even if it feels like you are not, because here you are choosing to continue, you are choosing to move forward in the direction of all it is that you truly do deserve, no matter how slowly the progress comes. Here, you are finding yourself again. So just be here. In this feeling, in this hurt, in this growth. Just be here in this becoming.