This is an 11 month difference.This is a hard post to make, because post competition weight gain was the most detrimental thing to my self esteem. I thought being stage lean and having 6 pack abs all the time was “the norm”, and anything that did not meet that standard, meant that I was “not in shape”. I never thought gaining 25lbs after a competition would happen to me. I stuck to my diet and workout plan to a tee. If I had the discipline to get through a prep, I could have it after prep..right? Nope. The body doesn’t always work like that. After restricting/overtraining, you’re going to reach a breaking point. I ate more than you could ever imagine. I would wake up swollen, I lost my period for 6 months, my depression was back, had NO energy, I’m now allergic to almost every food on this earth, and the gym felt like a punishment. Every night I would binge on thousands of calories. It was an endless cycle of binging and restricting. I was embarrassed to show myself in the gym. The worst part is people would look at my stage photos and be like “oh my god you looked so good!!”. And I’m thinking to myself like “yeah, I know, but what about now? Like that’s not me anymore”. The more cardio I would do, and no matter how much I would restrict, I would GAIN weight. -
thing I learned through this was: health=happiness. I wasn’t happy when I was lean. I was hungry, hardly had any energy in the gym and in my life, my brain didn’t function, and my mental health was sh*t. Im still paying for the damage I did. I will probably never be able to eat gluten and other foods again, due to the damage it caused my gut, BUT, I’m healthy!! I stopped trying so hard to lose weight. I decided to listen to my body. I listened to how much, and what I wanted to eat. I no longer count calories/macros, I don’t force myself to go to the gym. Food is fuel, not your enemy. This is what helped my body balance back out, and it helped me lose 8 lbs in about a month. I have strength and stamina. I was able to grow muscle and shape my body into a more feminine shape, which I could not do in a caloric deficit. I’m now able to focus my energy on improving myself as a person, not just as a body.