froyo date with two of my friends 😋 i got white chocolate strawberry with strawberries on top. i was stressed about this but afterwards i don't really feel guilty! it was delicious & i didn't eat enough yesterday anyway, so i needed to make up for it. my friend brought cookies, and i had a few bites of one (my ed didn't let me have any more because that's too many sweets in one day 😕) tomorrow we're going to the movies and getting chickfila for lunch which i'm pretty nervous for because i'll be getting fast food and sitting for a long time. i'm going to try not to let my ed boss me around though! hope everyone's day has been amazing 💗
This is on my story buT WHY THE HECK DO I SHAKE SO MUCY
I forgot I had this account. I of course am still sad time to time, i've started talking about my feelings more though. my thoughts run wild and i'm still a psychotic piece of shit.
Literally for the first time in 3 years I bought actual human clothes in my size. Not a size that I'd have to lose weight to be in, not a size that I wished I was.
My actual freaking size.
And the sizes of the clothes didn't feel like a disgrace, or a scar, or something ugly and gross. These clothes felt like a trophy, a sign of self love and belief in myself that I haven't had since my eating disorder really got ugly in late 2014.
So many recovery wins today. Yeeyee buddy.
Today I was in science and two fucking bitches were talking to a guy and he said he had an eating disorder, one girl was like "What do you mean eating disorder?". And his response was " I get depressed, so instead if eating less I eat too much." And I started getting upset and uncomfortable cause a girl answers "well don't be depressed" and I sat there for a second and almost straight up slapped her. Idk why I got so angry but I did. So all I said was "Dude! It's not that easy!" And she glared at me. Then the two girls were talking about how they're fat while me, bigger than both if them sitting there very uncomfortable... I just wanted to disappear.
#depressed #depression #suicide #suicidal #suicidalfreak #fat #anorexia #anorexic #fuckup #cutter #unwanted #unloved #lonely #edits #depressionedits #sadness #anxiety
Feeling all sorts of gratitude for all the love on my last post.
It is a scary fucking feeling to be vulnerable and real on this World Wide Web.
But by doing it, I hope it encourages others to do the same.
We all have a story. And each story deserves to be heard. You are all amazing.
Now, off to teach some yoga! Xoxo 💜
Pretty hard to beat The Bowl from @sonofagun_wollongong.
Perfect lazy Sunday lunch (not pictured, delicious buttery sourdough served on the side). It's been rainy for so long that we couldn't help but take advantage of the sun and grab one last summery meal before winter claws its way back into our lives!